tIME and hAPPINESS

I sold my beloved GTI today. I feel sad a little. It took me back to the day I bought it and the time in between until today. I poured my heart, soul and lot of money into it. I modified it. I customised it. I enjoyed driving it every single freaking day! I cherished it.

But this post is not about my car! The day lead me to think about the link between time and happiness. I read something years ago that spontaneously popped into my head. I don’t remember where I read it but it made perfect sense! It goes something like this!

Every damn thing that makes you happy will make you unhappy. Only time separates the two, your happiness and unhappiness.

This is quite obvious yet phenomenal realisation! I mean pick any stuff! The same shiny new house that made you feel so great; weighs you down after few years with maintenance and mortgage! Beautiful piece of clothing that looked so good on you; don’t fit you anymore. The shiny new sports car that made you feel like you’re a Michael Schumacher; doesn’t do it eventually! Give time and every damn thing that made you happy will make you unhappy or sad! And it’s not just material stuff, even most beautiful relationships and experiences too. Becoming a father has been one of the most joyful experiences of my life so far. Like every parent, I love my daughter and every minute that I spend with her. She gives me lot of joy. But wait for a decade and I am sure she may want to attempt something that I am against or not live up to certain expectations I may have of her. Same relationship that brought so much joy now brings unhappiness. Or just the event of separation when she grows up and moves out will leave me in deep agony.

Quite depressing, isn’t it?

It could be! One may ask then – whats the point? Why pursue and acquire things? Why live in the world and not become hermit? But this train of thought is quite dangerous and put you in lethargy! It can suck the zest out of life. Just like my car, I am pretty certain that every other thing that I acquire will eventually either disappoint me, make me sad or not fulfil me anymore!

But there is another possibility to look at this dark truth in a brighter light! That is — enjoy fully while you have it. Be grateful for it while you have it. Make most of it while you have it. Knowing and reminding yourself that it’s not going to make you happy forever; loosens the grip when its time to let it go. It makes letting go much easier. It breaks the illusion of ownership that we carry around in our head. Yes I still feel sad and unhappy today letting my car go but the intensity of sadness is not that overwhelming! I feel a sense of satisfaction and gratefulness underneath the sadness.

So the best approach is:

• Enjoy your home while you live in it.
• Flaunt that beautiful piece of clothing until it doesn’t fit you well.
• Floor that sports car and have fun until you have to let it go.
• Spend time with your children when they are around and make the most of it.

Enjoy while it lasts.